The hard balls were flying....

Blondage Best Friend (BBF), BBF's other half, and me and The-Man-That-I-Bang went to a baseball game Friday night.

I'm standing with TMTIB, hand over heart, tears welling up during the National Anthem....and my phone starts ringing.

And I start giggling......because it is the ring tone of my previously mentioned infamously Hawwwwwwt Perverted Friend (HPF) (I go back and forth on my phone with his ringer tone between "Hell" by the Squirrel Nut Zippers and "Blasphemous Rumors" by Depeche Mode depending on his behavior. This week, he is "Hell"!)

I answer, telling him to hold on.....he hears the National Anthem on in the background, and I grin as I hear the smile in his sleepy voice.

The anthem ends, and TMTIB hops off to buy a funnel cake.

HPF proceeds to make me blush scarlet. NAUGHTY MAN!

It turns out my team is playing HPF's team! We then make a "bet" of sorts on the outcome. Oddly enough, no matter who wins, the prize is the same. Hmmmm.

TMTIB comes back with a funnel cake in one hand and a chocolate ice cream in the other (is that cute or what?), and we head for our suite.

Oh! Did I mention we were in a fancy suite? BBF and I have killer connections.

It has become a tradition that when BBF and I go out drinking, we must text our HPF.......especially when hard balls are involved. Now that I think about it, BBF, hard balls are ALWAYS involved... (even on our old S. night dates!).....weird....?

I get back to the suite, tell BBF that the HPF is taking a nap, and we decide to have a few notes waiting for him.

So. Text transcript time.....

Blondage texts: BBF says we are watching balls again. Hard ones!

Blondage texts: Bases loaded. Your boys are going DOWN!

(boys going down....BBF and Blondage snicker)

Blondage texts: Got a run! Hehehehehee

Blondage texts: Not that I really care! I just want another margarita.

Blondage texts: (pitcher name deleted)! 3 up 3 down!

BBF and Blondage realize that HPF's team is just not attractive. At all. BBF, remember the guy with the ears? And that weird facial hair pattern? And goodness....all those eyebrows.....

Blondage texts: Our team is waaaaay better looking than yours.

Blondage texts: We kinda like (name deleted). Sooooo....the only cute one used to be a (our team name deleted). Hmmmm.......

Blondage texts: We have nicknamed your boys "The Caterpillars". Never have we seen so many scary eyebrows.

Blondage texts: I want (name deleted of gorgeous boy on our team) bad

By this time, BBF and I are pretty damn tipsy. BBF and I are looking at The-Man-That-I-Bang.

Blondage texts:BBF quote - "If I wasn't married I'd do The-Man-that-Blondage-bangs. He is sooooo cute! Me - "Yes, he is, But he'd come up to your BOOBS!" (BBF is almost 6ft, TMTIB is 5'9"-ish). BBF quote - "I did a shorter guy once. It was great!". TMTIB overhears, and pipes in "I know. Women can't resist me".

I didn't text the part where I bragged on TMTIB's bedroom prowess. That would have taken way too long to type. Blondage and BBF crack up...

Blondage texts: BBF's man wanted the camera man to focus the kiss cam on me and BBF. LOL!

And like magic, a text from Hawwwwwwwt Perverted Friend appears!!!!!

HPF response: LOL You two didn't want to make out?

Blondage texts: IT WORKED!

It's awake! *high fives BBF* I knew that would get his attention! *giggling*

Blondage texts: Not without you in the middle.

HPF response: OH! Damn! Um....OK!!!!!

HPF response: MmmmMMmmmmm you are being very naughty!

Blondage texts: Yes I am!

HPF response: You know I would be all over you two if I was in the middle....

Blondage and BBF giggle and drink some more.

Blondage texts: Alcohol. Cute (my baseball team name deleted). Hard balls.

Blondage texts: BBF wants to lick a bellybutton.

HPF response: Oh goodness! LOL! How about mine?

HPF response: Uh...you two are BOTH being very bad!

Blondage texts: BBF says she needs to go change her panties now.

HPF response: I know! Maybe I should come help the both of you, uh, change your panties?

Blondage texts: BBF is rubbing her boobs...

HPF response: LOL! No fair!

Blondage texts: Pretty much the norm for us ya know.

About this time, our men realize we are having entirely too much fun without them, stand me up, and push me over in to the seat between them.

Blondage pouts, looks down the row at BBF and says "BBF, I feel something has come between us".

Blondage texts: The boys split us up! LOL!

Blondage texts: Gotta pay attention to my man now. Grin.

HPF response: Ok! By the way....Baseball is NOT determined by cuteness.

Blondage texts: Oh yes it IS! It is ALL about the CUTE!

HPF response: *sigh* shaking head

BBF's other half susprises me with a text message that says "Nasty girl".

Blondage texts: "Takes one to know one".

And our team wins.

HPF, I expect to collect on our bet very very soon.