Woooo!

I've been on quite a roller coaster this week, my pretty pretty Flowers.

Sunday morning, I had a doctor appointment that shocked me.

I found out I had two, perhaps three, follicles "maturing".

Tuesday morning, I had a doctor appointment that shocked me even more.

I found out I had four follicles maturing.

This morning, I had a doctor appointment that damn near had me passing out.

I found out I have nine. NINE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Nine nine NINE!!!!!!!!!!! Did you hear that???!?!! N-I-N-E!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! NINE FOLLICLES! Ohhhhhhh sweet baby Jesus. NINE!!!!!!!!!

I took my "trigger shot" today. I am DONE with this round of needles, thank god. Saturday morning is our big "Procedure". We'll know in August if it works.

You guys know I call my husband "Sweetpea", right? And that most of my friends call him "Sweetpea" (or "The Pea") too....? Well guess what they are calling my follicles....?

BABY PEAS!

*giggling*

That's so cute it makes me ache.

Hmmmmm.....or perhaps that ache is just my Baby Peas dancing around, getting ready to hatch!

Thanks for all of your well wishes, thoughts and prayers.

Wish us luck! Heeeeere we go!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Yep, he nailed me

My First Dom emailed me a wee note that has had my wheels turning all morning.

Irony 2. a. Incongruity between what might be expected and what actually occurs

Masochism 1. The deriving of sexual gratification, or the tendency to derive sexual gratification, from being physically or emotionally abused

Masochistic Irony (my own term) When one who has a masochistic leaning fears needles.

He's so clever he makes my brain hurt.

It IS kind of odd that I live for rough sex, spankings, paddlings, floggings, etc; yet I am TERRIFIED of needles and the pain associated with those shots. The rational side of me can see that perfectly. It IS odd.

But.....the bratty side of me is sticking out her tongue and making a semi-obscene gesture, that would probably get her in a LOT of trouble.

*scampers off giggling*

Nympho.

It doesn't matter how tired I am.....how puny I feel.....how busy I am.....

I always.....ALWAYS......have sex on my brain.

It's kind of unnerving.

New look, shots suck, a couple obsessions

You may have notices things look a little different around here. :)

Wellll....my blog designer's company no longer has a working website, and my pictures were no longer supported on her photobucket account. I got tired of looking at garbage on my screen, dumped the old template, and started playing with this one.

The most gorgeous man in England created this banner for me about a year ago when I was having the place redesigned. His design was the inspiration for the last version of my blog. I fell in love with it, and am thrilled to have permission to use it. Thank you E.A. xoxoxoxoxoxoxo

* * * * * *

It's official. The shots are not going well.

First, comes my panic attack.

Followed by a second of relief after the needle goes in, fairly painlessly.

And then......OHHHHMYGAWWWWWWWWWWWWDDDDDDDD!

It STINGS and BURNS when he pushes in the plunger thingie!

I think we are doing something wrong. I am sooooo calling my doctor tomorrow.

AND, get this.

Every possible bad reaction? Oh yeah. You guessed it. Even down to the flu-like symptoms.

ACHOO.

* * * * * *

I have two new obsessions:

1. Generation Kill, a mini-series on HBO, based on one of my favorite books

2. Secret Diary of a call girl, a series on Showtime, based on one of my favorite blogs.

Opposite ends of the spectrum, yes......but both call to me.

:)

* * * * * *

Vicodin kicking in. Ahhhhh bliss. I must go pass out now.

And yes, I can have vicodan, for approximately two more days.

Beyond that? Alas, no.

G'night Flowers......

*drowsy kiss*

A little blue fishy on my ass....

I spent the entire day yesterday working myself in to a major frenzy of "The First Fertility Shot".

I scrubbed bathrooms that were not dirty.

I reorganized a closet that was already perfectly orderly.

I took two bubble baths.

I tried and tried to work off some of that nervous energy, but I just could NOT calm down.

You have to understand, I have a MAJOR fear of needles. It probably stems from childhood. I had to have stitches in my forehead, and I was strapped to a "papoose" board. I also get anxiety attacks if I feel "trapped" (under covers especially)....

But that is enough self-analysis for now...

So...

6:30PM. It was time for The Shot.

And I started shaking.

And shaking.

And crying.

And I totally freaked the fuck out.

My poor sweet husband was trying to hard to do his part, and I was NO help whatsoever.

He finally stuck me.

I felt him move the needle around (he has to pull back the plunger to make sure he doesn't hit a vein) and I about passed out.

He did it though.

DESPITE my state of hysteria.

I cried when it was coming, but I cried even harder when it was over. Relief I suppose.

You know what he did?

He bought me a wee surprise, hoping to coax a smile out of me.

We both love the movie "Finding Nemo". He has teased me about being "Dory the Delay Fish" ("you're the kind of fish that causes delays") for years.

My shot spot has a tiny little Dory bandaid on it.

It worked. I smiled.

Just keep swimming...just keep swimming.....just keep swimming swimming swimming....

Updates....

It should be obvious that I have once again lost my blogging mojo. Just can't get inspired these days. bah.

I'm fine. Feeling much better. Thank you for all your comments, emails and phone calls. I heart my pretty pretty Flowers.

Haven't had sex in fo-evah, which is a total drag, but other than that, I'm ok.

We start the fertility shots soon. We have "nursing school" on Monday, where the hub learns how to give them to me. I am already cringing.

But....it might work. :)

Thanks again to everyone who keeps praying for us and wishing us well.

xoxoxo