The Freak and I pull in to the driveway and in to the garage. We get out of our Gas Guzzling Kick Ass Republican S.U.V., and we hear SCREECHING.
It is, of course, a very excited Wee General.
The Wee General: *yelling* We're BACK! We're BACK from CAMPING! Did you MISSSSSSSS MEEEEEEEEE?!?!?!?!??!!?!??!?!?!?
The Freak: *laughs, smiles, stares at The Weapons of Mass Destruction, aka, the boobs*
The Evil Blonde: Well, how was it?
The Wee General: It was AWFUL! We can't wait to go back though.
The Evil Blonde: Uhhhh........????
The Wee General: Well, it was cold, we couldn't get a fire started because there was a no burn ordinance, so we didn't eat anything but smores made with a lighter.
The Evil Blonde: Uhhhhhh...........
The Freak: *still staring at The Weapons*
The Wee General: Well....I mean....when it's warmer and we can cook food we'll go back.
The Evil Blonde: All you ate is smores? Seriously??? You and Mr. Fitness and the kids JUST ATE SMORES for two days???
The Wee General: Well......I did make R. (her four year old daughter) eat a hotdog. It was cold and uncooked and she was whining her ass off.
The Freak: *continues to stare at The Weapons, drooling*
The Evil Blonde: And...?
The Wee General: Oh you should have heard me. I was yelling at her "YOU'D BETTER EAT THAT WEENIE!!!!! EAT IT!!!!! EAT THAT WEENIE!!!!!!!!!!!".
...which she yelled at the top of her lungs in my driveway........and I looked across the street in time to catch the neighbors' heads pop up and over at us so fast I was reminded of meercats looking for birds of prey in the sky.......
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13 comments:
oh. my. god.
you didn't make that up, DID you?!
she is a CHARACTER!
ghostie alix
BUH HA H AHAHAHAHAHA!
EAT that winnie!!!
She's a freak.
LMAO, I'd love a neighbour like that, she's the best.
I have to ask being from the UK, what are smores? Evie you'll soon have to put an English version up too. LOL.
Ghostie, nope, I didn't make it up! When Freak comes back from his computer sabbatical he can confirm it. *giggling*
And yes, she is, as we say here in the South....a MESS!!! LOL!!!!!
Maeve, I wish I could have tape recorded it and turned it in to an audio post. It was soooooo FUNNY! OMG! That girl.....
LL, indeed she is!
Suze, she is pretty goofy. That's probably why we get along so well.
Smores are sort of a "campfire" thing. Some people make them in their fireplaces too.
You're supposed to toast a big marshmallow over a fire, put it on a graham cracker, and put some chocolate over it. Soooooooo yummy.
My goofy neighbors were toasting their marshmallows with a cigarette lighter! LOL!
Lord have mercy.
Ditto that Coug!!!!
HEY !! I wasn't just staring at her Weapons !
She does have a very nice ASS as well *grools*
Are you drooling or "grooling" my little Freak? LOL!!!!!
And yes, her ass is amazing. Everything on that girl is amazing.
LOL!!! Got so worked up he couldn't even drool! LMAO!!! Does she read this???
HELL NO she doesn't read this!!!!
NO NO NO!!!!
She knows I have a blog. She knows it is naughty. That's it!
You do know that the previous posters ruined what could have been a perfectly good blowjob joke, don't you? :P
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