Saturday, March 10, 2007

Trouble!

Last week, a phone call...

Muscles: Did you feel me last night?

Me: Huh?

Muscles: At about 11pm.

Me: Uhmmm....huh?

Muscles: I fucked you in the shower. You liked it. Sarge liked it too.

Me: WHAT?!?!?!?!

Muscles: I was thinking about you while I got off in the shower.

Me: *squeak*

Muscles: *makes some weird sort of purr sound*

Me: *squeak squeak* Sarge....?

Muscles: Mmmhmmm....he's always at attention.

Me: *squeak* Sarge is your....OMG. What are you.....why are you......what the heck are you... *stammer, stammer, squeak*

Muscles: On Saturday, I'm coming to visit you. Does your office door have a lock on it?

Me: *stammer, pant, freak* MARRIED! I'm MARRIED!!!!

Muscles: *laughs* True. Guess I'll owe my friends more money.

Me: Oh god. The bet.

Muscles: Yep. I've already lost it once, so why bother trying?

Me: If you don't stay away from married women, you are going to be broke! *still freaking*

(Me to Cougar: Do you think he uses that "did you feel me" line often? And it WORKS?
Cougar to me: *stammer, sputter, squeak* eeeeeeeeew!)

The next day, another phone call...

Muscles: You must be thinking about me. Sarge is at attention again....

Me: *shrieking* NO!!! Stop-it-stop-it-stop-it!!!!!!!!!

Muscles: My chest and arms are even bigger now. If I flash you in your office, will you flash me back?

Me: .....at WORK?!?!?!? NO!!!!!!!

Muscles: So that means after work I have a shot?

Me: *shriek* MARRIED!

Saturday...

Me: *pacing, pacing, pacing*

....and suddenly, there he is.

JESUS CHRIST! The man is just......massive.

Muscles: So, can you tell?

Me: *trying not to drool* Yes.

Muscles: Just yes?

Me: Yes. Just yes.

Muscles: *makes his pecs dance*

Me: Oh my.

Muscles: Wanna feel?

Me: Yes.....NO! I mean NO!

Muscles: *takes my hand and puts it on his chest*

Me: *I freeze, and feel his piercing blue eyes staring me down*

Muscles: What time do you get off? Do you want to get off with me? Or would you prefer ON me?

Me: *blink*

God help me.

12 comments:

Easily Aroused said...

Ah, the danger and delight of temptation....

~EA

Anonymous said...

He's a freak. He's a freak. Don't stare into the light, it will only mesmerize you!! hahahahaha

Anonymous said...

Oh you want to play so much... And from that description I do to! Tell you hubby, tell him that you want him... Tell him temptation is driving you temporarily insane and you're not responsible for you actions....

LMASO

Loved the post!

Anonymous said...

OMFG!!

DO NOT GO TOWARDS THE LIGHT!

DUDE...we have a deal! Just tell hubby that he can take a trip to dallas....

maybe that will help? oh god, now I am being a pervert...lord, shit, damn...

uhhh...mmmm...tempTATIONNNNN!!!

Anonymous said...

Get your damn eyes off muscles..I never see you anymore and I just looked...*smack* you still have me as spitfire.

No wonder I never see you anymore.

Now I want to kick muscles's ass...he is a damn distraction.

yum..

Anonymous said...

Wow ... he really has your number ... I bet he's discovered your blog.

~Jef

Blondage said...

Jef, he knows about my blog. I got drunk at a staff party and told him about it. He doesn't visit though. He only likes pictures. He told me my site had too many words on it.

*bites tongue*

Stealth, I know, I know. I have a lot of dead links, and I need to add Steath and TG's new blog to my links. I suck at keeping up! Forgive me? Spank me? Please? ;)

Devil, Hub would have kittens if I played with Muscles. OMFG!!!! LOL!!!!!!!!

LL, I'm trying not to be mesmerized by the pretty pretty colors and the pretty pretty muscles on Muscles, but.... *whimper*

EA, perfectly said, as always. ;)

Blondage said...

Jef, he knows about my blog. I got drunk at a staff party and told him about it. He doesn't visit though. He only likes pictures. He told me my site had too many words on it.

*bites tongue*

Stealth, I know, I know. I have a lot of dead links, and I need to add Steath and TG's new blog to my links. I suck at keeping up! Forgive me? Spank me? Please? ;)

Devil, Hub would have kittens if I played with Muscles. OMFG!!!! LOL!!!!!!!!

LL, I'm trying not to be mesmerized by the pretty pretty colors and the pretty pretty muscles on Muscles, but.... *whimper*

EA, perfectly said, as always. ;)

Hoochie Mama said...

I'll spank you! You're a bad girl! Come out and play with us!!!

*sob*

*spank*

*sob*

*spank*

alix said...

oh HUSH!
you love it.
hell, I'D love it.
well, not from him, but, ya know.

Anonymous said...

Evie, honey, you are soooo doomed. Maybe it's time to just sit back and enjoy the *ride*. Ride - get it? LOL

tkkerouac said...

Nice, I love your thumbnail and catsuite.

keeping the blog alive...

Blogger deleted my political blog (rest in peace, "Realitively Unbalanced"), because I wasn't logging in often enough. No way ...