This man is HOPELESS! LOL

Scene: My Office, last weekend
Players: Moi, He-Who-Has-Rather-Large-Muscles

Muscles walks in to my office, pouting up a storm.

I see him and gasp.

Muscles lets out a very heavy sigh.

"Ok buddy, OUT with it."

"She decided she didn't want to be my girlfriend anymore. She said I didn't put out enough."

....yet another shining example of fantasy usually being better than reality....

"Uhmmmm. *blink* Well, did you try to talk about your difference in sexual opinion?"

"She doesn't understand that sometimes I just need to be held."

....I stare at him....jaw on the floor....

"She told me about a week ago she just wanted to be 'ocassional Booty Buddies', not my girlfriend."

"....and your reaction was....?"

"Well, I said yes, because I do enjoy looking at her ass."

Must not laugh....I must not laugh.....

"Ok, so what happened?"

"She came over last night at about 3am, after she got off work. I was about half asleep at the time."

"Rut roh."

"I answered the door. She walked in, hugged me, and said 'Hi Booty Buddy'."

"Mmmmmkay.....and?"

"I said 'Hi, Hump and Dump."

....and I stare., dumbstruck...

"So.....we're over."

"Uhm....yeah. You're lucky you didn't get a black eye."

I feel my eyes twinkle, my lips twitch.

He grins.

"Well geez, I was half asleep at the time. I meant to say 'Hi Hump and Bump'. I didn't realize I had said Dump until she started yelling obscenities at me."

....and another's one's gone, another one's gone, another one bites the dust-uh.....

Oy.